Most people don't understand how much is sacrificed for awakening to one's truth and authenticity. It's like being stripped naked and rebuilding yourself from the inside out. I went all in!
My spiritual awakening was the end of materialism for me. I realized that having”things” was suffocating me. My world was revolving around “stuff.” I've never been really materialistic but that saying, “the more you make, the more you spend,” is very true. My husband(ex) and I didn't have a lot of money, but we did a lot of things and had toys…camper, boat, 2 cars and we worked a lot of hours to get them. Sacrificing ourselves and quality family time for them.
We began our healing journeys around the same time and we quit our jobs to do it, so we lived on very little. We sold every asset (except the house) that we had. At first, I was pretty sad and embarrassed that we had to sell things we worked so hard to get. Those things showed our value, our worth. But as time went by, I started to realize that not having to go to work everyday meant I had time to enjoy the little things…stuff money can't buy. The simple things: Listening to the birds chirping, watching the squirrels in the yard, sitting outside and not having distractions, the quietness of not being out in the world. Since we didn't have money after quitting our jobs, we had to find free things to do. I've always loved the outdoors, but I gained a whole new appreciation for nature and embraced it. While the rest of the world was losing their minds when we had to lock down, that was just another normal day for us…no big deal. I know how to live in simplicity now…in fact, I require it. That's my true soul essence.
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I spent several hours every day for years meditating and gaining knowledge and healing from my traumas. Traumas and emotions that were buried so deep that my conscious mind wasn't even aware of them. That was my new life at the time, and I don't regret one minute of that decision because I was able to heal and release my baggage. To free myself. A sacrifice worth every tear drop, every friend, every family member I lost along the way. Even losing the old versions of myself was like losing a dear friend. Many who knew me then, thought I was nuts for doing what I was.
In the end, I even lost my marriage and future I had all planned. Starting over from nothing. I don't see it as the end of my life, but the beginning of my authentic life.
I'm a whole different person now and I see things from a much higher perspective. My experiences do not define me, they were merely lessons to awaken me to my soul. Self care and self love is my priority now while helping others with what I've healed and learned.
I believe simplicity is humanity's true essence. We've been blinded and manipulated to live in and depend on a material world. What looks like sacrifice, is actually just remembering who we are.
Thank you for reading!
Carmen